1st He Adds His Name To The Kennedy Center, Now Trump Is Introducing ‘Trump Class’ Battleships
At this point, it’s becoming more and more clear that President Donald Trump’s go-to strategies for coping with his plummeting popularity are raging on social media, giving word salad speeches nobody asked for, and naming things after himself.
Seriously, that has to be the reason for his obsession with slapping his surname on buildings and products, as if everything he touches needs to carry the mantle to serve as an ode to the many businesses he has bankrupted. But he’s not stopping at buildings, bibles, and bitcoin — now, he’s stamping his name on battleships.
Trump made the announcement during an event at his Mar-a-Lago estate in Florida while standing next to a massive poster of a ship that reads “Trump Class” and “USS Defiant,” the official name of the vessel, which Navy Secretary John Phelan said will be “the largest, deadliest, and most versatile and best-looking warship anywhere on the world’s oceans.”
From NBC News:
Trump’s eponymous battleships will be armed with guns and missiles, as well as hypersonic weapons, electronic rail guns and high-powered lasers.
“We envision that these ships will be the first of a whole new class of battleships to be produced in the years to come,” Trump said, noting an eventual goal of 20 to 25 new battleships.
Phelan said the battleships will also carry the “nuclear-armed sea-launched cruise missile.”
The last time the U.S. used battleships in combat was in 1991, during the first Gulf War against Iraq.
“These have been under design consideration for a long time, and it started with me in my first term, because I said, ‘Why aren’t we doing battleships like we used to?'” Trump said Monday.
The Navy is tasked with leading the design of the new battleships, which are expected to be ready early next decade, according to the Defense Department. Trump said he will also play a role, “because I’m a very aesthetic person.”
Really, y’all? Are we really going to pretend it’s not painfully obvious that the president is compensating for something here? The guy who thinks boat batteries will sink ships, causing shark attacks, is now hosting infomercials for his new brand of battleships equipped with nuclear missiles and high-powered lasers.
Is he planning on bombing another Venezuelan boat, or is he just happy to see us?
Oh, and Trump is an “aesthetic person”? SIR, YOU ONLY RECENTLY STOPPED SPRAYTANNING YOUR FACE RUST-ORANGE BEFORE EVERY PUBLIC APPEARANCE!
Again, this has to be all about him, right? He’s slapping his brand on warships when the U.S. hasn’t used warships in just under 35 years, because it helps with his insecurity over his approval ratings sinking faster than his imaginary ships with imaginary giant boat batteries, isn’t he?
Mind you, this all comes as Democratic lawmakers are filing lawsuits to bar Trump from adding his name to the John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts, which was named for President John F. Kennedy to memorialize him after he was assassinated. It’s bad enough that Trump would add his name to the building when all he has done for the Kennedy Center is take over and tank its ticket sales, but to desecrate what was meant to honor a president who was killed is just plain political vandalism. And bringing things back to my original point, it’s all just part of an elaborate and desperate coping mechanism.
We’re talking about the only president in modern history (maybe even history in general) who routinely holds campaign-style rallies after he’s already been elected. He can’t deliver a single paragraph of a speech or social media post without taking random shots at his predecessors, likely because he’s hopelessly insecure about Joe Biden and Barack Obama being clearly better presidents than he is. Last week, he declared that the New York Times is a “TRUE ENEMY OF THE PEOPLE” all because the outlet ran an op-ed piece about how our 79-year-old president is showing visible signs of age and fatigue — you know — the exact same thing he spent some four years saying about “Sleepy Joe” Biden, who, by the way, did not, during his presidency, go viral for falling asleep during Cabinet meetings.
If Trump really wanted to do something about his dwindling popularity, which has even penetrated his ever-loyal MAGA base, he could try not running the executive branch like a fascist, authoritarian dictator who is obsessed with forcing his name and legacy on America. He could try not being a loud and proud bigot, or, at the very least, not flying off into unhinged rants about cancer-causing windmills, his newly discovered word “groceries,” and the aforementioned boat battery shark attack nonsense.
Nah, Trump isn’t going to stop being Trump; all that will do is alienate his core demographic of uneducated racists.
He’s just going to put his name on a battleship. That’ll show us.
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