Bland Opening, Bland Closing: Fake Attorney Katie Zacharia Out As White House Press Secretary 

President Donald Trump’s new press secretary, Katie Zacharia, is already out of a job after a comically abysmal debut at the White House press pool, followed immediately by a scandal over her not being a practicing attorney, despite repeatedly presenting herself as one.

I mean, after the firings of Pam Bondi and Kristi Noem, I would say, “Another one bites the dust,” but in this case—did the dust even have time to settle? It’s been five days.

Look, if we didn’t already know Zacharia’s pink slip was being printed out when she got on stage sounding like she was reading aloud for the first time literally ever, we knew she was gone the second Trump was asked, “Would you have liked to have known that Katie Zacharia didn’t pass the bar?” and after going into his usual whiny routine about the big, mean media, he said he told his new hire, “Honestly, if I were you, I would reconsider.”

Of course, when Trump said, “Katie has been treated very badly by the media,” it was yet another example of this president simply deciding he won’t deal in reality. Make no mistake: it wasn’t just “the media” that went in on Trump’s new DE-White hire; virtually the entire internet did, because we were all watching the same press conference.

Honestly, though, these white women in the Trump administration are going to have to come to glory on the realization that they don’t get to mess up like the men do. They don’t get the same Idiocracy pass that is constantly granted to Pete “Hold My Testosterone” Hegseth and Kash “Bestiality Love” Patel. Women in the right-wing world simply don’t have that MAGA dud-bro currency. Patel, Hegseth, and the like get to embarrass themselves and the administration on a near-hourly basis, and their jobs might still be secure for at least one more political cycle, but the second these women start making the administration look even the least bit worse than it already makes itself look regularly, Trump will be back at Blonde Depot, trying to find his next trophy employee.

It’s a sad way to make a living, ain’t it?

SEE ALSO:

White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt Announces Her Resignation

Katie Zacharia Is Bad On Stage And Lying About Being A Lawyer