NFL executive Troy Vincent takes pride in wife’s book ‘The Table of Life’

Throughout successful careers as a standout NFL player and now a high-ranking league executive, Troy Vincent has leaned on his wife, Tommi, for support and guidance.

So when Tommi – a longtime advocate for women who’s also known for throwing down in the kitchen – considered writing a book that blends her love of cooking with lessons from her life, her biggest cheerleader was right at home.

In The Table of Life: Nourishing the Soul with Food, Love, and Faith, Tommi shares deeply personal stories about suffering heartaches, facing shame and, ultimately, experiencing the restorative power of growth through faith and perseverance – all while strengthening her soul by preparing her favorite meals for loved ones.

Tommi delivered the book she set out to write, Troy said.

“The vulnerability she showed, her courage and her willingness to bring her full self to this Table of Life – I’m just so incredibly proud of Tommi,” said Vincent, the NFL’s executive vice president of football operations.

“This book isn’t just about past hurts or triumph. It’s about showing others that strength often lives in just being real and honest with yourself.”

Tommi welcomes readers to her table, guiding them on an emotional journey. Life lessons are served in each chapter along with recipes for her favorite dishes, including baked macaroni and cheese, collard greens and sweet potato pie.

From the kitchen to the table, it’s a story a lifetime in the making.

“It’s empowering for me, the ability to share things that you tuck away because you believe they will disqualify you from spaces and places,” Tommi said. “Just to be able to share those things, so people can see the other side of those challenges.

“And if you see me today, you wouldn’t have any idea that those things, those challenges, took place in my life. However, all of it did. They did take place. And the things that I thought were my disqualifiers actually became my qualifiers.”

One of her challenges: surviving domestic violence in her youth.

“When people read my story of domestic violence, what I hope they will take away is that domestic violence has not defined me,” Tommi said. “It has, however, been instrumental in developing this resiliency that I wear as an honor today.

“It allows me to know, No. 1, that I can do hard things. Also, when I shifted the power dynamic in that situation, it allowed me to take full authority over my life. Now, I have the opportunity to be a light and provide hope for other victims and survivors, to help them recognize that we have the power of our voices. We have the power to be who we are able to become. Those things that happened do not have to define us.”

Married for 31 years, Troy and Tommi raised five children and have 11 grandchildren. They met in Trenton, New Jersey, when Troy was in high school and Tommi in middle school, but didn’t start dating until Troy’s rookie year in the NFL.

An All-America cornerback at Wisconsin, Troy was selected in the first round (seventh overall) of the 1992 NFL draft by the Miami Dolphins. Over a 15-year career with the Dolphins, Philadelphia Eagles, Buffalo Bills and Washington Commanders, Troy was a five-time Pro Bowler and a two-time Associated Press All-Pro.

In 2002, Troy won two awards that honor players for their commitment to philanthropy and community service: the Walter Payton NFL Man of the Year award, and the Alan Page Community Award. In 2005, he was honored with the Bart Starr Award, presented to players who best exemplify outstanding character and leadership in all aspects of life.

Troy joined the league office in 2010 as the vice president of player development. Steadily, he climbed the ladder, being named to his current position in 2014. Among other things, his responsibilities include game operations, officiating, player operations and football business strategy.

“I’m not in this position without her,” said Troy, who also served as a two-term president of the NFL Players Association. “And by that, I mean I’m not close to being where I’m at today as a father, as a husband, as a son, and as a grandfather without my rock.”

While being strong for her family, however, Tommi was battling depression for years.

“If someone saw her during that time, you’d go, ‘Oh, no, she’s good. She’s got everything.  She’s living the American dream,’ ” Troy said. “But for a long time, she was in a dark place.”

By helping survivors of domestic violence, Tommi re-entered the light.

A sought-after motivational speaker, she has been honored with awards for her advocacy. Currently, Tommi serves on the executive committee of the National Domestic Violence Hotline.

“Part of what The Table of Life talks about is that I spent a great deal of my adult life cultivating the dreams of Troy and my children. During that process, I was not cultivating myself,” Tommi said. “I went into depression because there was a lack of nourishment for myself. With all of the experiences of trauma that I had earlier in my life, it all bubbled over.

“When I was in depression during that time, there wasn’t strength to be had. I wasn’t in a place where I could find that. I love my husband. I love my children. I wanted the best for them, and I saw greatness in all of them. I saw what they could accomplish. For me, that was just part of who I was. I was being an intricate part in ushering them into purpose. But we all need nourishment.”

Tommi finally received the nourishment she needed to thrive as an individual. Through her book, she hopes many others will, too.