The Disappearing Act: 5 Reasons Why a Romantic Prospect Ghosts You

When it comes to ghosting, we’ve all experienced it. Whether it’s a recruiter who promised to follow up after an interview or a childhood friend who said, “Let’s catch up!” but never replied when you reached out, it’s more common than ever.

“Ghosting” refers to abruptly cutting off all communication to end a relationship without explanation. In romantic situations, people often go from accepting that humans sometimes suck to thinking the act is more significant than it really is.

Though it is painful, it is important to realize that another person’s inability to communicate effectively is not a reflection of your worth or desirability. If you’re wondering why you were ghosted by someone, we’re here to provide some insight — although we may be wrong. Keep reading for five reasons why ghosting occurs in relationships.

1. Some people rather avoid a potential partner than engage in a confrontation. 

Unfortunately, some people avoid confronting their emotions. Expressing their emotions to you and risking a negative reaction feels too difficult. Is this emotional immaturity? Absolutely. However, some people simply lack the emotional intelligence to handle breakups. Even in casual situations, saying “This isn’t working” feels like too much. Don’t beat yourself up about it.

Think about it this way: Some kids waited on the porch for their dad to play basketball, but he never showed up. That person who didn’t have the decency to say goodbye? Not worth your energy.

2. Some folks get emotionally overwhelmed and disappear.

Romantic relationships don’t come with PTO days for mental health breaks. Is it immature for someone to slowly pull away when they’re struggling to balance their life? Yes. But have we all been there at some point? Also yes!

This may not be the kind of partner you’d want to continue seeing, but juggling life’s challenges can cause some people to isolate. They’ll resurface when they’re feeling better. At that point, if you choose, you can listen to their explanation and decide how to move forward.

3. You lost the secret competition with another prospect.

Dating can feel like a sport when someone is seeing multiple people. You might see the full potential in them, but you may only check off a few of their boxes. Instead of just saying, “I appreciate your time, but I’m pursuing someone else more seriously,” they stop talking to you. It’s not right, but it’s OK. You’re going to make it anyway! Is that a popular Whitney Houston lyric? Yes! And it’s true — you’ll make it anyway!

4. They want to use your reaction to ghosting as an ego boost.

It’s tough to believe this if you’re kind-hearted and treat others with respect. But some people wake up and choose violence. They use your reaction to ghosting to boost their low self-esteem. Did they chase you at first? Yes. But while you played hard to get, they might have waited until you were vulnerable to get revenge.

5. You were close to finding out an uncomfortable truth about them.

Manipulative tactics like love bombing, great sex, and future faking can make you fall in love while viewing them through rose-colored glasses. But, like any magic trick, the inconsistencies eventually become obvious. Not many people, aside from villains, are okay with being seen as the bad guy. So, before you expose them for the weak fraud they are, they disappear.

People ghost for all kinds of reasons. Instead of getting bogged down by it, remember that it’s not a reflection of your worth. Move on, learn from the experience, and don’t let anyone dim your shine.

Have you ever been ghosted? Or maybe you’ve done the ghosting yourself? Drop a comment and share your story with us!

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